Ten Metal Bands to See Before You Die: The Dillinger Escape Plan

This.



With the Metropolitan Museum of Art hosting a schmancy “Punk: From Chaos To Couture” gala attended by Hilfigers and Kardashians this month, one could be fooled into thinking that all danger has been completely erased from rock n' roll. Then you see a band like The Dillinger Escape Plan. Rock music is going to be OK, although I worry that these guys might not be.

When anything gets burned or broken at a rock show, usually it's there to be destroyed. Notice how Paul Stanley's guitar shatters in the exact same place, at the same time in the show, night after night after night. But when something--instruments, equipment, bones--gets broken or torched at a Dillinger show, one senses that these boys just couldn't control themselves. If Greg Puciato starts running towards the crowd, get out of the way. If he brings out a torch, duck. If there's an encore, you've done something right. Show me someone who thinks that Karen O is insane, and I'll show you someone who's never seen Greg Puciato.

Watching Ben Weinman play guitar reminds me of Jerry Lee Lewis setting his piano on fire, or Kurt Cobain flinging himself into Dave Grohl's drum kit. His ability to make math-rock stay in your head has earned him a spot among today's metal greats, but his performances are in a league with the most dangerous rock legends. I don't know many people who could play "Panasonic Youth" sitting down, much less while swinging the guitar around and violently jerking back and forth. Whoever is in charge of equipment at the Bowery Presents clubs probably begs the promoters to not book The Dillinger Escape Plan.

When I get a chance to breathe, sometimes I wonder how much further these guys can go. There may not be a more musically or physically demanding band in the world. I can't imagine they're getting much compensation, unless blogger admiration counts for something. Every time someone leaves the band, I'm a little disappointed but never too surprised. But whether Puciato, Weinman and the rest of DEP break up tonight (and, considering this month's One of Us is the Killer, that would be a crushing loss), or whether they're as young as Lemmy when they're 65, watching them on any stage is one of music's rarest and most dependable thrills.

Judas Priest, "Painkiller"

The sharpest point that I ever heard in the Priest vs. Maiden debate is that Judas Priest are more of a guitarist's band, whereas Iron Maiden are more of a bassist's band. Regardless of which side you fall on, this makes perfect sense. For all of their bombast, Maiden's solos are relatively succinct, and songwriter Steve Harris's basslines are right up there with Bruce Dickinson in the mix. Judas Priest practically founded metal's now-ubiquitous twin axe attack. It's no surprise that Lemmy prefers Iron Maiden, or that Kerry King champions Priest.



Nowhere are those lightning guitars better heard than in the title track to Painkiller. "Painkiller" doesn't just sound heavy for 1990, or for guys pushing 40. Listening today, in 2013, "Painkiller" is downright brutal, far nastier than any of the power metal it supposedly inspired. Drummer Scott Travis, making his first-ever appearance on a Priest record, wastes no time in implementing blast beats into the Priest formula, and it works shockingly well. Tipton and Downing's solos are so frenetic that even guitar wizard Chuck Schuldiner tried something completely different when he covered "Painkiller" on Death's final album. Rob Halford's frequency-pushing vocals are at an all-time high, perhaps acknowledging that he can go further now to complement his band's flourishing energy. Your parents might have even tolerated "Living After Midnight," but there was no way that they were getting down to this.

You'll hear about how Painkiller was Judas Priest's comeback, a response to two lackluster albums (Turbo and Ram it Down) and a sharply-delivered boot to a world of Poisons and Warrants.
But 1990 was an incredible year for metal. Painkiller was up against Rust in Peace, Seasons in the Abyss and Cowboys from Hell, all Album of the Decade candidates. More than a nail in the glam metal coffin, Painkiller was a gauntlet to the thrash and death metal legions, and an example of how Judas Priest could make a melody sound even meaner than a death growl. Listen to what Amon Amarth did with a similar main riff 18 years later--it completely rocks, but it still doesn't sting the same way.



To paraphrase Ornette Coleman, this is the shape of metal to come.

If I Ran the Lilith Fair

Amelia doesn't believe that I enjoy any female artists.



If I Ran the Lilith Fair

1. The Go-Go's, "Our Lips Are Sealed"
2. The Breeders, "Cannonball"
3. Joanna Newsom, "The Book of Right On"
4. Hole, "Violet"
5. Sinéad O'Connor, "The Emperor's New Clothes"
6. Best Coast, "When I'm With You"
7. Liz Phair, "Stratford-On-Guy"
8. Made Out of Babies, "Cooker"
9. Arch Enemy, "Silent Wars"
10. Joan Jett & the Blackhearts, "Bad Reputation"
11. Tune-Yards, "My Country"
12. Fiona Apple, "Hot Knife"
13. Patti Smith, "Dancing Barefoot"
14. Lily Allen, "LDN"
15. The Knife, "Heartbeats"
16. Laura Marling, "The Muse"
17. Joni Mitchell, "You Turn Me On I'm a Radio"
18. Madonna, "Cherish"
19. Janet Jackson, "Love Will Never Do (Without You)"
20. The Blow, "True Affection"
21. Björk, "Human Behaviour"

Mascots Playing Poker

Via Megadeth's Facebook page.

Austrian Death Machine

The news of Tim Lambesis' arrest is horribly sad. There's plenty schadenfreude going around the internet now--watch how Fox News salivates over the idea of taking down a famous metal singer, whereas the Huffington Post puts Lambesis' Christianity at the forefront of their story. Between this and the boorish Evan Seinfeld interview in this week's Village Voice, it has not been a good publicity month for metal frontmen. If your friends are forwarding either of these stories to you, send them back a Randy Blythe or Jacob Bannon interview.

I'm not wild about As I Lay Dying, Lambesis' second-rate metalcore band that took their name from a Faulkner novel and earned Lambesis most of his bank. However, I seriously enjoy Austrian Death Machine, Lambesis' short-lived side-project that specialized in turning Arnold Schwarzenegger one-liners into thrash metal choruses, from "Who Is Your Daddy and What Does He Do?" to "Screw You (Benny)" to my favorite, "Rubber Baby Buggy Bumpers". It's the kind of idea that works so stupidly well, you'll be surprised that no one thought of it earlier. The best songs on ADM's two albums, Total Brutal and Double Brutal, are some of the catchiest thrash that you'll hear. Even the skits ("What It's Like to Be a Singer at Band Practice") make me laugh. Austrian Death Machine had just two albums and only one joke, but it was one of modern music's greatest.

Twenty Questions

Inspired by this, via Tim.



Twenty Questions

1. Megadeth, "Peace Sells"
2. Strapping Young Lad, "Love?"
3. Iron Maiden, "Can I Play With Madness"
4. Sikth, "Where Do We Fall?"
5. Bad Brains, "How Low Can a Punk Get"
6. AC/DC, "What Do You Do for Money Honey"
7. Diamond Head, "Am I Evil?
8. Stormtroopers of Death, "What's That Noise?" 
9. Metallica, "So What"
10. Black Sabbath, "Who Are You?"
11. Alice in Chains, "Would?"
12. Dysrhythmia, "Will the Spirit Prevail?"
13. Sleepytime Gorilla Museum, "What Shall We Do Without Us?"
14. Ministry, "So What"
15. Suicidal Tendencies, "How Will I Laugh Tomorrow"
16. Deftones, "What Happened to You?"
17. Living Colour, "What's Your Favorite Color?"
18. Van Halen, "Could This Be Magic?"
19. KISS, "Do You Love Me?"
20. Led Zeppelin, "How Many More Times"

Better Off Dead

I don't know how it took me until this weekend to see Better Off Dead, the nightmarish, John Hughes-via-Kafka teen comedy starring John Cusack. If you haven't seen it yet, go check it out, but if you already have, take a moment to honor the Van Halen-related clip below.